posted by John on Oct 1
Marriages Are Made In Heaven
I still can not believe I was the single most important decision in my life in just forty minutes. The stage was set that day in August for the usual prelude to the arranged marriage. The prospective bridegroom is to become his bride in order to make such a final decision. The parents had discussed this game for a few months and agreed on a suitable venue. As in the case of modern arranged marriages, it can never be a necessity, because the children are free to accept or reject the match.
As a free spirited young lady, I was never in the mood to get married. I wanted to pursue more work and higher studies. My head was full of ideas and I was sure that a wedding at that time, all my planning would slide. I was sure that I will always plotting my next steps, and the marriage never in my long list of FIG.
I am unmarried and belonged to a traditional society, where to stay is to be comparable afflicted with a disease. I knew that my parents would never allow to hold me any more about my single status. I have no choice in this matter, but I knew I would be selecting the most appropriate person.
In July 2005 I came home from my job after the end of a much disliked job. I was considering a shift of residence and other employment opportunities. I had many outstanding candidates, waiting for the elusive interview calls.
This summer has been so intense time for me in terms of personal and professional life. Mumbai was the venue for meeting the man-to-be. I got the train reservations for travel in this great metropolis of modern India did. Like all the plans you were looking for picture-disaster.
Heavy rain showers hit the entire western India. Mumbai and adjoining areas were flooded with water monsoon. The communications and transport infrastructure was severely damaged. The railway canceled all of its services. Mumbai city was paralyzed left scores of stranded residents scurrying for cover.
I was only too happy that my review was postponed. I had read much about these meetings. There was often the prying eyes of the prospective parents, criticized comments made in some cases, shy groom-to-be and difficult decisions are made. But the delay was short-lived. The groom had to spend a few days in India and it was because of his worldwide travel ventures further.
Air transport was disrupted in India despite the bad weather. I managed to get flight bookings for Mumbai. It was another last-minute delay in the trip after I reached the airport at the time of the early departure. A plane was run over-runway in Mumbai and the airport was not to accept further traffic was removed until the aircraft. In the meantime, the rains in Mumbai.
I sat in the airport completely unaware of what was going on. I had already checked in and waited for my flight if I make a call from my brother who was waiting to receive me at the airport in Mumbai. I noticed the pandemonium in the airport with a delay or cancellation of flights. The people stood in long queues but not given boarding passes.
‘Avoid travel to Mumbai, if absolutely necessary, “a sharp voice shone through the airport speaker system.
Within minutes, the passengers were canceled and will run on the tickets or make alternative arrangements. Some passengers with small children in tow complained about missing their connecting flights. Others argued with staff at airports. Confusion filled the airport lobby.
There were others who accept their fate and waited patiently. Some families spread leaves on the ground to settle her weary children. The normally calm airline employees were eating. Confusion reigned, as the airlines were able to appease the angry customers.
I thought of a different approach. I thought the cancellation or postponement of the flight. I would then have to get back to my checked luggage. I had some problems back home in the adverse weather conditions. I decided to wait, and my flight status monitor. The largest private airline canceled all its flights to Mumbai. I was posted to the national airline and she had just moved my flight status labeled “indefinite”.
I approached the counter for further inquiries about my flight. The lady in charge told me that they have no information from Mumbai airport. She told me that the airline was willing to take the stranded passengers to the nearest airport hotel. They agreed to bring us back to when the flights to Mumbai resumed. I realized that this is the only alternative. Soon I was sent to the comfort of a nearby hotel.
I was able to relax and to refreshments there. I spent hours surfing the TV channels in the hotel room waiting for some information from the airport. It was about ten at night, when I received a call from the hotel told me that my flight was ready for the trip. I was sleepy, but until then, been able, climb down into the lobby.
Upon reaching the airport, I realized that the passengers were still stranded. The private airlines were not given permission to Mumbai where land. The national airline that I flew managed to get a slot. After a quick security check, took off the flight and was on his way to Mumbai. However, the plane had still circle around Mumbai for some time until given clearance for landing.
I reached Mumbai at around two clock in the morning. It was not so difficult to find my brother. His tall stature ensured that his head among the crowd waiting for the delayed passengers were visible. He also had his regular Punjabi taxi drivers with him. We loaded up the taxi with my luggage and went inside to go to his house in Mumbai.
My bad luck continued even then. The taxi did not give up and was like a stubborn child stationed reference. My brother and funny taxi driver got out and pushed the taxi. The engines push back to life after a few hectic. I saw the roads under water, flooded shanty towns and people who try to bring it home, that even at odd hour.
I relaxed for a few days in my new surroundings. The preparations were on the important meeting in Mumbai. The groom had to Mumbai from a neighboring town to travel to meet me. His plans were thwarted a couple of times because of weather conditions. The day before the proposed date for the meeting, I received a call from an interview in Mumbai-based company as a result of an application I had sent months earlier. They seemed very happy to know that I have been in Mumbai. They asked me to come in the next day in the after-noon for the interview.
I am pleased both events are on the same day. I was just anxious to get it over with. It would be exciting to see the results. Hospitality is in the Indian culture and events like this revered required perfection. My brother arranged to my aunt the next day for some clues.
I stood in the early morning hours to fix a meal, chicken stew and bread, halva, fruit and sweets. I sought the meeting as natural as possible. A bolt of lightning went through my head when the door bell rang. I wonder whether I was willing to enter into marriage. It meant a lot of commitment, changes in lifestyle and many compromises. My head exploded with the thought of how I was called into the living room to meet the guests.
I was glad that the atmosphere was very familiar. We both went to a corner to talk in peace. I was shocked to see that the bridegroom was not under the usual standards. He was in time and was in a relaxed mode. He explained to me a little about his past, his goals and his vision for the future. I distinctly remember him telling me that his family wanted a daughter and not a daughter-in-law. We had a brief exchange of experiences and ideas. In India, the final decision is always made together as a family. In contrast, he said his decision to go with marriage.
I was happy with the proceedings of the day and thought of yet come to a conclusion. I was impressed by the relaxed nature of the bridegroom, his reasoning, his ability to communicate and a strong personality. I thought I trained for a perfect lady in the world and pursue different interests. I was sure that he would match my skills, if not better.
My brother and I rushed to the job interview venue as we were running late. I did not relax too much, until I came into the lobby of the office. I met with the interview panel within a short time. The interview was a little slow, but was quite simple. I was able to maintain balance and to answer all quite good. I was sure that I will be called for the next round.
As expected, I was called for another session the next day and soon joined. During my time there I never thought about such an immediate appointment at this company. It fascinates me, he really up to date. This is one of the best memories I have is from this place. The decision to leave my job, was particularly painful because the rapid appointment. The contract was fulfilled, rewarded and the people were warm for me. My work was appreciated and my opinions were valued. I’m trying to find a job in this new land. I have over many rounds with the companies here, reaching even final stage left. However, I have not seen the same degree of openness to diversity in the workplace here in Belgium.
After customary meeting with the groom, I have a quick decision to marry him. Both families worked on the details of the marriage to take place six months later is on my birthday. We both know each other, was always determined only in hindsight. I think it is a great degree of trust that we placed together in this decision.
The choice of a life-partner is a difficult decision that people take years to complete. Wait for the right time and person. Arranged marriages work on the concept that it is not so much about the right person, but the fact is the right person. This decision is a much the best decisions I ever made in my life. Although we are completely opposite personalities, there is a common chemical binding us together. We laugh about our differences and few similarities.
Entrance into the married life is a life-changing incidents. It is a unique learning experience. There’s a lot of marital bliss, and some inevitable arguments. All healthy relationships have different opinions too. The success lies in the management of differences and keep the delicate balance of life. It is often said that marriages are made in heaven. I would add that heaven on earth for in successful marriages.
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